What To Do?

I was looking forward to my trip to the pub; unbeatable breakfast and decent beer for under a fiver.
So I sat down. There was some weird monkey-looking thing at the next table. It starts making noises with its teeth and pus-looking lips.
I don't pay it much heed except to look over and give a snort of derision. When I look, it freezes as if it is playing some sort of deluded musical chairs game.
Anyway, I have my lovely breakfast, and the thing starts making yawning noises, to prove how relaxed it is in face of its own terror.
Then it starts talking to the staff, and it is clear it is a local creature which knows and is known by the workers in the pub.
So there it is. Tell it to fuck off and get thrown out? Or tell it to fuck off in little lipsmacking noises?
What a heap of crap the English situation is.
In America, you might shoot or get shot.
But here you have to endure the victimisation by things which impersonate people, or get wrecked resisting.
Fortunately, they try it in the street too, and then you really can wind their little brains up and out.